Laws of …
What does this have to do with contests? NOTHING! Be sure to add YOUR laws to the list.
LAWS OF THE NATURAL UNIVERSE
Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease,
your nose will begin to itch or you’ll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least
accessible corner.
Law of Probability: The probability of being watched is directly
proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone: If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy
signal.
Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were
in will start to move faster than the one you are in now (works every
time).
Law of the Bath: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone
rings.
Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know
increases when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.
Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t
work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional
to the reach.
Law of the Theatre: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest
from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss
will ask you to do something, which will last until the coffee is cold.
Murphy’s Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room,
they will have adjacent lockers.
Law of Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing
face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and
cost of the carpet/rug.
Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are.
Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don’t know what you
are talking about.
Brown’s Law: If the shoe fits, it’s ugly.
Wilson ’s Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like, they
will stop making it.
Here’s MY addition …
Murphy’s Law of the Movie Theater:
If you are sitting in a perfectly empty theatre, two bonehead, noisy teenagers will come and sit DIRECTLY in front of you.
Enjoy your encounter with “the laws”
Melanie
Written by guru on August 31st, 2006 with
1 comment.
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#1. September 23rd, 2006, at 3:17 PM.
ADDTHESE TO THE LAWS - HARRISON’S AXIOMS FOR HOMEOWNERS:
Axiom #1 - THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A “SMALL” JOB.
Axiom #2 - NO MATTER HOW THE JOB TURNS OUT, YOUR WIFE WILL BE SURE IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER TO CALL AN EXPERT
Axiom #3 - SHE IS PROBABLY RIGHT
Axiom # 4 - NEVER TELL YOUR WIFE AXIOM THREE!